I'm Proud To Be An American.

Brazilian Sidewalk

Where at least I know I'm free, dang it!!!

I got into a rather heated discussion this week with some of our investigators.  They had some questions about good ol' Murica and I happily responded.  They in turn decided to change our discussion into a "Let's bash on the USA" discussion.  I in turn defended my land like a true patriot and I did not back down!!!!  You don't realize how big of a patriot you are until you live in another country where people like to make fun of the USA.  YOU CAN'T TAKE THE SKY FROM ME!!!!!!!!

We had zone conference this week, as usual it awesome.  President Gonzaga talked about the change of a new mission president we'll be having soon and how me are part of King Nebuchadnezzar’s dream.  There was lots of trainings, and spiritual things, and was an overall jolly time.  The assistants did a "Book of Mormon responds to the questions of the soul, northeast Brazil version" which was really funny, and actually helped out quite a bit.

Maceio Zone Conference

This week I also had the opportunity to give a surprise talk in sacrament meeting woohoo!!!!!  The secretary told me about 25 minutes before sacrament so I had to prepare with much haste.  I ended up speaking about repentance and the role we as members have to help those who are need of repentance, who maybe have lost there way, and to show those who do not know the path to salvation and eternal happiness.  I felt like I did pretty well.  I'm getting more and more comfortable with speaking in church and I don't even really need to write down that much to help me!

We went to war yesterday.  Elder López and I had to take off our missionary tags and put on our "Johnson and López Professional Marriage Counseling" tags.  We were teaching a couple who were trying to get married.  We brought a copy of "A Família: A Proclamação ao Mundo" to them and we were trying to teach them how to raise a successful family based on Christ.  The lesson went over very well, until the end.

Then the bomb went off.

The two started fighting accusing each other of heinous deeds and all sorts of terrible things.  She started crying and he wasn't being too nice to her so López and I had to swoop in and save the day.  They said they were going to need a marriage counselor, but we told them how to save their relationship.  The problem, their relationship wasn't based on the family, each other, or Christ.  One of them was only thinking about themselves and refused to put the needs of other ahead of his own.  We did damage control with advice such as:

"The relationship has to have humility and forgiveness.  You can't let what the other says hurt you and you need to be able and willing to forgive them."

"Take a piece of paper and write down your goals you want as a couple."

"José take a piece of paper and write down all of the good qualities she has and share it with her.  No, I don't care if she already knows these things, you have to be supportive and express how you really feel to her."

"A relationship with a foundation not centered on the gospel of Jesus Christ will not stand."

"You need to learn to forgive and not let your emotions get the better of you."

"Look what you did José, you made her cry, APOLOGIZE!!!!"

Yeah it was an absolute mess.  We talked with them for a good hour and half and I think we got almost nowhere.  In the end we left with a prayer and no one was happy.

One thing I've learned during my mission is how I want to raise my family.  I definitely don't want to have my family be like the mess we had the other day.  You learn how much of a difference the gospel makes in the lives of families.  There's a big difference between the families in the ward who are faithful and apply the gospel in their lives and a lot of the other families I see throughout the day, where they only care about themselves and children are either accidents or not that big of a priority.  

You kind of see a big polarization here.  On one hand you see a lot of single moms with a lot of kids and no husband because he's probably drunk, abuses her, or just doesn't really care.  You see lots of problems with drugs and what disobedience to the law of chastity brings.  The other day I saw 2 ten-year-old kids sniffing glue on the bus.  Some guy got mad at them, told them to study, and threw their glue out of the bus.  They then got off to go and try and find it.

On the other hand you see families that just radiate the spirit, everyone is happy, the family is most likely to have both a father and a mother, and there is peace.  You kind of see a huge difference down here and it makes me think how I want my future family.  So thanks Mom and Dad for a strong family based on Christ, it really makes a huge difference.

Well, that's it. This week is Carnival, so things should get pretty interesting.  I hope I'll be able to send you all an email next week but I have my doubts, it is in fact Carnival.

Até logo!!!

-Élder Johnson

Jaca

Oh Valentine's Day

Every missionary’s favorite day.

They actually don't have Valentine’s Day down here, they have "Dia dos Namorados" but that's not for a few more months.  Apparently they have Valentine's Day in Argentina though.  Valentine's day filled me with much sadness and longing to see my significant other; I just have to find out who my significant other is first.  I'm so lonely....

So I got to try something that I haven't eaten for quite some time this week.

Brownies...

Yes I didn't believe it either, it's been a few months since I've had a good brownie and for lunch the other day a member made brownies, which is a rare delicacy down here.  Right now is Jaca season so there's been a ton of Jaca fruit for sale the past few days.  I got to try Jaca too; it's pretty good but has a pretty weird taste, almost like a banana.  It does, however look nothing like a banana.  It's this giant, green, spiky, fruit, which is larger than a watermelon, and it grows on trees.  If a Jaca falls on you, you'll probably die.  I also got to try something called "Brinco de Viúva" which is like a grape mixed with an olive and tastes about the same.

We taught one of my favorite lessons the other day, we taught this lady who had previously met with the missionaries and one of her kids was baptized so we decided to teach her.  She had a ton of questions and all of them had answers that we had.  She said it was like everything was making sense and that she finally understands things about the gospel she didn't previously understand.  She even started answering her own questions correctly which was awesome, definitely one of my favorite lessons yet.

We had a FHE with one of the ward families the other day to try and integrated some of our investigators with the ward.  It went over pretty well, I shared a message on faith and the food was good.  We also had pretty good entertainment in the form of a cockroach flying in through the window, (yes they fly down here, mind you this was on the ninth floor of an apartment building, how it got all the way up there I have no idea.)  Everyone starting screaming and freaking out and chaos ensued.  The little devil was disposed of and all were entertained, well at least I was, I thought it was pretty funny.

We had the baptism for one of our investigators this week.  She lives with family who are part of the church and lots of missionaries had tried to baptize.  We decided to be patient with her and she decided to get baptized on her own!!  It was a great service, everyone was happy, especially her mom, who wants all of her kids to join the church!  We had her uncle baptize her and it was definitely a very special moment.

This week was awesome and all is well.  Thanks for all and I hope your Valentine's Day wasn't as depressing as mine. Until next week!!!

Elder Johnson

Perspective

Me and a monkey.

Hey! How's it going!?

Things down here are going pretty well, we had a pretty good week.  We started off the week doing an activity in the church, we gave a spiritual lesson on the atonement and our ward mission leader had some games for everyone to play, which got pretty heated.  People can get pretty competitive over musical chairs and Pictionary.  The activity went over well and everyone had a good time.  We in turn, were able to bring some non members to the church in a not so frightening unchurchy way, which they seemed to like quite a bit.

We had a leadership meeting this week with everyone in Alagoas and I got to see a lot of people, including Elder Rutledge!!!  This meeting was pretty awesome!  We talked a lot about how we can help our districts and zones become better and how to add inspiration into our leadership.  President spoke a lot about perspective and how our perspective matters which got me thinking about how much of a positive perspective Mormon doctrine really is.  Some people think Adam and Eve kind of condemned us all by eating the fruit of the tree, when we have the perspective that they did so that we could be here and have joy.  Some people don't know why they have trials or are quick to curse/forget God, when we have the perspective that our trials are for our benefit and that we can overcome them through the love of Christ and that we can learn in grown by way of them.  I just thought about how optimistic the gospel is and how much our Father wants us to be happy in this life.  Just an interesting thought I had.  President then talked about the growth of the church here and a bunch of new areas that are going to open up for missionary work soon.  He talked about some wards dividing and branches becoming wards, which got me really excited for the work.

We also had a baptism this week, we had it for the cousin of a member and it was awesome.  The spirit was so strong there and everyone was really excited.  We even had his cousin baptize him, which was really special.

Getting ready for the baptism.

Anyways this week was pretty good and nothing too crazy has happened.  Thanks for everything and I know you guys will be gone, but I hope I receive an email from you guys this upcoming week, if not I will probably cry a lot and just be a mess walking down the streets for the next week. You’ve been warned.

-Élder Johnson

Pizza makes me happy.

Some People

Well to start off this week, I spoke with some girl who got pregnant at age 14.  Kids these days.

This week was pretty good.  The work is going over well, we're having less actives returning and we had quite a few people at church yesterday.  We're teaching pretty well and things are generally going good down here. We are teaching one family, like complete family:  Mommy, Daddy, Son, Daughter, and Dog.  We're working to get them baptized this month, but we've got to get them married first, which is a bureaucratic nightmare.  They're really cool though, the ward likes them and anyone who enters the house, be it man or beast, the dad of the family always says "Hey, look at this guy, he's going to be a Mormon!!!"

It's pretty funny having Elder López as my companion, we always have conversations with people a little like this:

RANDOM GUY:    Hey! Where are you from?

ME:    I'm from America.

RANDOM GUY:    All right, and what about him?

ELDER LÓPEZ:    I'm from Argentina.

RANDOM GUY:    ...Man you're going to suffer here during the world cup.

We always have really good conversations with people because of the Brazil/Argentina soccer rivalry.

Some drunk guy stopped us the other day, asked us where we're from and he then asked me the following question:

DRUNK GUY:    Alright American, I have one question for you.

ME:    Okay.

DRUNK GUY:    Who is the king of Futebol.

ME:    Pelé

He then let out a little whimper and bowed himself in front of me and worshiped me as a king because I agreed with him and the rest of Brazil in agreeing that Pelé is the king of soccer.  He then proceeded to bag on Maradona, the disputed king of futebol from Argentina to Elder López.  We have a really good time talking with people.

We did however, not have a really good time talking to some other guy the other day.  We were about to teach this guy's mom and we were about to say the opening prayer when he just got up and said, "I don't agree with you Mormons and your Joseph Smith."  He then talked forever about the 6-day war that Jerusalem had and how god intervened.  He didn't tell me what that had to do with Joseph Smith, but I think he was just trying to make himself look smart.  Elder López and I then bore testimony to him and we were on our way.  While leaving his house he said something along the lines of "And now here you go.  You're all just going to continue being closed minded and you won't hear the truth."  I then told him if he just were to be just a bit more humble he could pray to God and get an answer, but he's just going to keep on being prideful.  I don't know, the mission has made me a bit more of direct person, which I don't know if that's a good or a bad thing.

All in all it was a good week, not as intense as last week, but it was good never the less.  I laughed pretty hard at the loss of dad's front tooth.  Sorry dad, but that's just too funny.  Did they hide rocks in the granola bar?  Have fun with your dead guy tooth, I'll just keep preachin' down here, until next week!!

Élder Johnson

The World is Ending.

So this week was transfers.  I've got another round here in the garden and I got a new companion, Elder López, from Buenos Aires Argentina.  He's got a pretty cool accent and things are going really well. He's really funny.

Our investigators are going well, we've got some new ones, cut some old ones, and we resurrected some old investigators too!

As the title might have suggested, the world is coming to an end down here. This week has been absolutely nuts! There have been car crashes, robbings, helicopters flying of the Grotas with huge lights searching for some thug inside, and all sorts of craziness.

The week started off weird enough with some guy who had some serious anger issues, who decided to take his problems out on a jaca. He just kept picking up the jaca and throwing it on the ground. It was a jaca douro, or a hard jaca, so you can't just break the thing by slamming it on the pavement but this troubled man sure thought it would work out all right.

Jaqueira (Jaca Tree)  These things are a big larger and harder than a watermelon and they grow on trees.

The next day was even crazier.

This story first starts off about a month ago, when we asked some member if we could help them paint their house, they said yes, then they painted it without us and we were sad.

A month later, (Thursday in fact,) we were talking on the road with some old guy with very little hair. He was in fact dying the little patch of hair on top of his balding head jet black and it looked super funny. We were talking with him when we heard, what appeared to be, the sound of a house falling down. The noise was coming from a road parallel to us. People started looking down the road, and others came running away from the commotion carrying dogs and children and what not. We decided to see what it was and when we looked down the road there were just flames being shot onto the ground by some unknown source. When the fire stopped, we walked down the road to find that the commotion had come from the house of said member.

So what happened was that this member has a son who sells corn and mungunzá next to the local super market. He does so with a cart and inside the cart he has a propane tank that heats the corn and mungunzá. It turned out though, he put the wrong hose on the end of it and it couldn't take the pressure, therefore it blew up. The hose started shooting fire out of one end so the son of the member, a fireman, kicked the cart out into the road. The fire didn't stop and just kept spraying flames willy nilly in the middle of the road. Everyone fled and one guy even successfully pushed a VW hippy van out of harms danger. The propane tank ran out of gas and all was well.

The crispy corn cart aftermath.

When we went to go investigate we saw the guy and his sister cleaning up the debris so we went to go help them, while everyone else just kind of gawked at the aftermath. The guy first started picking up the corn (both Elder López and I thought he was going to go and try and sell it,) and we carried the ill-fated corn cart inside.

Nobody was harmed and the house was completely fine, except for one wall, which will need to be repainted. So the moral of the story is, if you're going to tell the missionaries that you're going to let them paint your house, you better well do it! or your house is going to blow up and the missionaries will just have to come and help you repaint anyways.

The next day yielded much adventure too.

We were walking to an interview when we saw one of our investigators working at a gas station, so we decided to come back and talk with her after the interview. On the road back we stopped by the gas station to make an appointment with her when some drunk guy was trying to get us to come over and talk with him. We treated him like a normal drunk guy until he yelled "YOU TWO NEED TO GET OVER HERE AND DO SOMETHING THIS MAN IS DYING." We then briskly walked into the gas station to see what all the fuss was.

Turns out that some guy started to have an epileptic seizure in the middle of the gas station and he was just writhing on the ground. Us and about 6 other guys grabbed a hold of him and tried wrestling him to the ground. Man that guy was strong, it took 8 of us to keep him from smacking his head against the tile while we waited for the ambulance to come. While we were wrestling this guy, the drunk guys kept buying beer and were just being super obnoxious the whole time "BREATHE OUT YOUR MOUTH AND IN THROUGH YOUR NOSE!!!!!! OUT YOUR MOUTH AND IN THROUGH YOUR NOSE!!!!!!! UHHH… CAN SOMEBODY ELSE TELL HIM WHAT TO DO!? I'M GETTING TIRED!!!!!"

We then watched the ambulance drive by and park at the wrong gas station so somebody had to go run over there and tell them of their error. They got there and tied him to a gurney with rope, like the rope Grandpa uses to tie his boat to the dock, and they carried him away. It was a very dramatic scene and it was a good thing we decided to pass by and make another appointment with our investigator.

Well that's it for this week.  There was indeed lots of excitement and I'm absolutely terrified of what's going to happen next week if this transfer is going to continue as so. Anywho, I'm going to go paint a wall. Hope all is well back home. Love you all and have a great week!

-Elder Johnson

He Was Lost, and Is Found.

I'm so tired.

The last week I had to give the lesson in gospel principles about our Heavenly Father's plan, which was loads of fun. The ward secretary then informed that one of the speakers hadn't come and asked me to give an emergency talk. I was prepared to lay down the law, at first I was a bit nervous but then I got over it and was excited to discourse. The speaker then showed up and I was out of a job and surprisingly enough, I was a bit disappointed that I didn't have the opportunity to speak.

So they gave us the news yesterday and it looks like I'm staying for round three here in the garden. I am setting Elder Torres loose into the big wide world as he has now finished his training. I sure hope I taught him well.

I also met a guy with the last name Johnson this week. I thought he was pulling my leg because I've been in Brazil for almost a year and I had never come across someone with the last name Johnson. I thought he was just trying joke around with me or make fun of my name but it turned out to be true. When I walked into his house, he showed his mom my name tag and screamed "Elder Johnson!" and got all happy because her son will be "Elder Johnson" too.

This land never ceases to amaze me. I love Brazil.

This week was the week of interviews.  We had interviews with President Gonzaga, which is always a good, insightful time, and I also had to do lots interviews for the sister’s baptisms. I did the interviews this week and they all were very interesting experiences. Mind you, that none of these people lived close to one another, so there was lots of traveling. Interviews are a very interesting experience. Some of these interviews had complications and they told me things that they'd never told anyone before. I thought it strange that people I had just recently met, trusted me enough to share some of their deepest and darkest secrets, but then I thought, that they weren't really confessing their sins to me, but were in a spirit of true repentance.

Interviews are probably one of my favorite things to do, you get to see people who have truly repented of their sins and are in search of a better life and they always have some amazing stories to tell.  There was one person I interviewed, which I judged to soon, when they told me who he was, he looked to me like someone who never would be baptized, but when I spoke with him, he absolutely blew me away. His stories and his intention to follow Christ completely caught me off guard and he probably was one of the most elect persons I have ever met. Goes to show that you really can't judge people.

I had one interview that was really really cool. I talked with a man who had been carrying around the weight of a pretty heavy sin for many years and he just told me how bad he felt for what he had done. We went through the process of determining if he could be baptized and when he was cleared for baptism it was so cool. It was amazing to see real repentance and to see the atonement work in the lives of others.

In my studies this week, I was reading in "Jesus, The Christ" and I read the story of the prodigal son. I love the part when the son comes home. 

Luke 15:20-24

20 And he arose, and came to his father. But when he was yet a great way off, his father saw him, and had compassion, and ran, and fell on his neck, and kissed him.

21 And the son said unto him, Father, I have sinned against heaven, and in thy sight, and am no more worthy to be called thy son.

22 But the father said to his servants, bring forth the best robe, and put it on him; and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet:

23 And bring hither the fatted calf, and kill it; and let us eat, and be merry:

24 For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found.

I was touched at the acceptance his father showed to him, that even after all he had done, there was still repentance, and even more, they celebrated his return. I love seeing true repentance and the happiness it brings, that it makes everyone happy and everyone rejoices. The atonement is such an amazing gift and is infinite, that we always have the opportunity to repent and that we may feel the love of our Heavenly Father and truly feel the atonement. The joy of repentance extends more than our own personal happiness but it makes our Father in Heaven immensely happy too, as he says:

"And let us... be merry: For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found."

-Élder Johnson

Coxinha!!!

Makin' holes in the wall.

Dear Mamãe,

It's going pretty well down here in Brazil and yes it's very hot.

This week was your basic, average week here in the blessed land of Maceió.  Like always, it was hot, humid, and filled with lots of excitement.  The excitement though, I have a hard time remembering, so we will see how this letter goes.

So this week we did a service project.  There's this member here in the ward that is really helping us out and she needed help with a renovation in her house so we decided to help her our.  We spent the morning breaking away walls and chiseling holes in order to put in the electric work.  I picked up my hammer and chiseled and went all barbaric on that wall and made me a few pathways for electrical outlets, I felt pretty cool.

I also got my haircut pretty short.

Walking on the streets this week, I heard a an angry, shirtless man, with a cigarette in his hand calling for "Coxinha!!"  For those of you who don't know, a coxinha, is a Brazilian snack, which is shaped like a drop, is made of a corn batter, has chicken inside, deep fried, and served with ketchup. Tasty.  But it came to pass that coxinha wasn't a culinary treat, but was in fact, the littlest Chihuahua I've ever seen and for some reason this man was very unhappy with him.

We are now entering the last week of the transfer, I'm almost done training and it's been a pretty great experience, I've learned a lot, and I've felt that I've grown quite a bit because of it.  It has been a very challenging time, but it's been a time of much learning and changing.  We've been working pretty well this past week and we had some investigators at church this Sunday with some less actives we've managed to reactivate.  I really have no idea if I'll stay or not, I've really like the area and I'm excited for the future.  Até logo!

-Élder Johnson

Zona Maceió B!!!

Hump Day

Hi.

First off mom, there's no such thing as too much Portuguese.

This week was very interesting, it was the New Year so everyone was drinking, singing, and dancing with much rudeness.  T´was a bit difficult to teach people but we got over it.  New Years was basically a normal day except I used the horn and noisemakers you sent me to make all manner of loud and obnoxious sounds.

Speaking of loud and obnoxious sounds, we were out walking the streets the other day when this guy, who looked a lot like Santa Claus passed us on the road.  He looked at us and, in what appeared to be a witch like cackle, yelled "Smitchy! Smitchy! Josephey Smitchy!!!" (that's how people here pronounce the name Joseph Smith) and laughed his way on yonder.

We also taught a lesson to some guy who believes in Espiritismo (Spiritualism).  He gave a very good case for reincarnation using the Bible to point out that John the Baptist was indeed Elijah reincarnated and that Jesus Christ wasn't resurrected but was in fact reincarnated.  It was a pretty interesting discussion and he gave a really argument.

I also tried Tererê yesterday too.  It's a lot like Chimarrão (a drink) but it's cold and you put juice in the herbs, it's really good.

This week I also had my Hump Day, which was a day of mixed feelings.  I felt good that I made it half way, but that means I only have another half of my mission left.  I don't know it was just weird; I'm planning on celebrating it though today with pizza!!!!

So the worst lesson of the week was yesterday.  We went to go teach this lady and I really had to use a lot of patience.  She was super old and I'm pretty sure not a lot was going on in her head.  She didn't understand what I was saying, she didn't understand what my companion was saying, and she just barely understood what the member we brought with us was saying.  We had a discussion that went a little like this.

ME:    "Do you have the desire to follow Jesus Christ?"

LADY:    "I've never seen him."

ME:    "No, do you want to follow him."

LADY:    "I think it's going to be pretty hard to see Jesus."

COMPANION:    "Sister, do you want to be closer to Jesus Chris?t"

LADY:    "Well how am I supposed to see him?"

The member explains what we're trying to tell her for five minutes.  We then explain to her why it's important to follow Jesus Christ.  She agrees with everything.

ME:    "So sister, will you follow Jesus Christ?"

LADY:    "I still don't understand how I'm supposed to see Jesus when he's in heaven."

I then just started laughing to myself in a mixture of ridiculousness and inner soulful pain.

The BEST lesson of the week was something entirely different.  We are teaching this couple and we need to get them married.  It's been a bit of a complicated process and in short, if they get married, it's going to be super expensive for them.  We were on divisions that day so the Zone Leader and I went to teach him.  We taught a lesson in a storm of dropping scriptures, powerful testimony, and the promise of blessings.  The spirit was UNDENIABLY STRONG, and in the end they agreed that it would be better to count on the blessings of God, instead of material wealth. Oh it was an epic lesson.  Our investigator wasn't too happy because he hasn't received his dowry yet, but I think he'll get over it.

This Sunday was the Sunday of powerful testimonies.  Everyone who got up to speak bared a super powerful testimony.  In the end our recent convert Marina got up and bared her testimony of how she has seen the hand of God in her life, the blessings of this gospel, and how she desires to see all of her adult children baptized.

Needless to say I was a very happy missionary in that moment.

Well it was a really good week, I'm going to get eat Brazilian pizza now, so until next week Family and Friends!

-Elder Johnson

This is the Grota in my area. 

This is Aldebaran, which is a really nice condominium neighborhood in my area.